


Monna Innominata

by havocthecat



Category: Jekyll (TV)
Genre: F/M, Post-Series, Women Being Awesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-21
Updated: 2012-03-21
Packaged: 2017-11-02 08:06:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/366826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/havocthecat/pseuds/havocthecat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Klein-Utterson, before Miranda finds Sophia Jackman, Claire waits.  She's very good at waiting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Monna Innominata

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted [on Dreamwidth](http://havocs-cry.dreamwidth.org/46807.html).

_I loved you first: but afterwards your love,  
Outsoaring mine, sang such a loftier song  
As drowned the friendly cooings of my dove.  
Which owes the other most? My love was long,  
And yours one moment seemed to wax more strong;  
I loved and guessed at you, you contrued me  
And loved me for what might or might not be—  
Nay, weights and measures do us both a wrong.  
For verily love knows not 'mine' or 'thine';  
With separate 'I' and 'thou' free love has done,  
For one is both and both are one in love:  
Rich love knows nought of 'thine that is not mine';  
Both have the strength and both the length thereof,  
Both of us, of the love which makes us one._  
\-- Monna Innominata [I loved you first] by Christina Rossetti

When they leave Klein-Utterson's manor, Claire pushes herself past exhaustion, takes her children's hands, and walks away with her head held high. The boys are back to normal right away. Thank God. Claire can't put them in therapy. What is she going to do if they start talking about how Daddy is two different men?

Tom spends at least a week talking about how good it feels to be alone in his head. Claire waits until his back is turned to roll her eyes. After all, Hyde had thought Tom was dead and gone, and look how that turned out. She's positive, absolutely positive, that as long as one of them is alive, both are. Hyde just needs time to heal.

Tom is safe, warm comfort. Or he was, before he tore himself away from her because he didn't trust her with the truth. She understands not trusting Hyde; he's feral. When Hyde focused his gaze on her, it's like there was nothing else in the world. Her breath caught, every time, because there's nothing more exciting - and terrifying - than Hyde, yet she's never felt more safe.

Some part of her wants the life she used to have with Tom, Eddie, and Harry. To forget about Alice Cameron, with her nights in a London lit by fire, of Hyde and everything Sophia Jackman told her. The breathless part of her wants to damn the consequences and run off with Hyde and the boys.

Either way, Hyde is her husband. He's the other half of the man she loves. He's the half she _doesn't_ have to work to figure out, but maybe that's because he's seen less of the world. He's growing up too, just like Tom did. All she has to do is be patient. Claire is very, very good at being patient. After all, Tom was gone for months, and she waited, just waited, damn it, to find out what was wrong with him.

Once Tom tells her that Miranda and Min are all right, that they've opened up their detective business again and have taken Katherine Reimer on as an associate, Claire insists upon going to see them.

Tom tries to argue, possibly thinks that she'll be jealous of Katherine, but Claire is past all that. Katherine is far too much a professional to fuck her boss, either of them. She's got an appreciation for friendship with people who care about her, not the money Klein-Utterson paid them to befriend her. Their friendship is the kind only two women who have lived with the same men can have.

Claire emails back and forth with Katherine about Tom's inability to remember how to wash up after dinner, but that's rare. They talk most often about anything but Tom, like films they've both seen and books they both want to read. Min chimes in and calls it the "Post-Utterson Electronic Support Group" on the days Katherine leaves her email open.

Claire means to keep up their acquaintance, no matter how much Tom wishes to forget all about that period of his life. When Min refers to Hyde as "Mr. Sexypants" at their first visit, Claire drops her tea from laughing so hard. She glances up after setting her cup on the table, and Tom's eyes are black, for just an instant, and he's staring at her with that peculiar, intense look she's used to.

Her breath catches, but she doesn't say a word to Tom. Maybe Hyde will never feel up to coming all the way back, and, besides, she doesn't know what to do if he does. Hyde isn't made for cozy domesticity, not the way Tom is. Taking fifty, a hundred bullets? Not even Hyde can recover from that easily, maybe not at all. She's not so sure of anything any more. There's been no other sign of him, not after all this time.

They don't take the boys to the zoo. Ever. Or watch wildlife documentaries about lions.

It's a month after their visit when Tom works up the courage to fuck her again. He's affectionate. He's loving. He's asleep not ten minutes after they're done. Men. Claire lays on her side, stares at the wall, and wonders if he'd wake up if she got out her vibrator.

He doesn't, though Claire leaves marks on her hand from when she bites herself to muffle her cries.

A month later, she gives up on the idea that Tom will be passionate on his own, and ties him to the bed after he falls asleep. It's a dirty trick, but she's through with playing nice. It works too, and this time Claire's the one who falls asleep first. With a smile on her face, Tom tells her later.

Three months after that, Tom's eyes turn to pools of inky black. Claire smiles in triumph. Later that morning, at breakfast, Eddie asks when Daddy's coming back.

"When he's ready," Claire tells him. She's a patient woman.

They get the news Miranda's found Tom's mother. He's full of questions, of course. Claire lets him go see her alone. After all, she's met the woman. Sophia's hardly a threat.

No one expects Tom to come back, two hours late, with the news that Sophia Jackman is Mrs. Utterson. No one but Claire expects that the lights will flicker out, and that Hyde will appear.

\--end--


End file.
